Tuesday, March 10, 2009

10 Fatal Mistakes Men Make With Women, Mistake # 1

Overfocusing On The Behaviors And Actions You Want From Women Instead Of First Focusing On Creating The Right Emotions To Motivate That Those Behaviors And Actions

This concept could turn your entire life around when it comes to fulfillment with awesome women.

Listen: for the most part, as males, we are very behavior and action focused. We think of terms of what we want to do, how we want to act, and what we want others to do and how we want others to act.

We don’t ask questions about how we want women to feel. We ask questions about how we can get women to act. You see, to have great results with women, you don’t just need to change your actions. You need to change how you are thinking.

However, when it comes to women, the key to getting them act the way you want is to ask: “What are the emotional states in which it would be most natural for her to do all these great things with me, to me, and for me?

Now, when I ask this question in my seminars, the answers I typically get from students are:

Lust

Fascination

Arousal

Attraction

Urgency

All very good, very useful, and very powerful emotional states in which to guide women.

But I would also balance these with the following:

Safety

Trust

Comfort

Connection

You see, not only do most guys not even think in terms of emotional states. They don’t think in terms of having the proper balance of emotional states.

The “nice guys” are fantastic at creating the comfort states. So a woman feels perfectly safe. But perfectly safe and only that leads to hearing…. …”Let’s Just Be Friends”

To which I say, “No. If you want a friend, get a dog.”

Guys who can only or mostly generate the heat states are certainly much better off than the “nice guys”. But the problem for these “players” is that often, as turned on as a woman might be, if she doesn’t also feel some kind of comfort state, she’ll put up lots of last minute resistance or just plain talk herself out of the entire thing. Or go ahead with it and deeply regret it the next day and make the player’s life a living hell.

So not only will creating the right mix of emotional states of heat and comfort much more easily get women jumping into your bed. It will help make the entire experience much more rewarding and fun for you AND them.




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